Epiphany

She sat in her favourite corner, knees bent, coffee within reach, notepad and pencil ready, with serenity on her face.

“Today, I set you free. And in doing so, I set myself free.

I am clear now in my head of where I am and where I want to be. I certainly do not want to be tied to you and definitely do not want you to feel obliged to me.

Today, I put to rest all the fallacies I believed in, the made-up life in my head, the slights and faults that were mine, the concern and understanding that were yours.

I chose you to love, but you weren’t in that relation; you knew where you stood. I was the one who chose to hope.

Today, I have clarity. Today, when my mind is open and free of illusions, let me do the needful and cast aside all the wishful thinking I have been indulging in.

This is what it is, and whatever ‘this’ is, is all that will ever be. You never claimed to offer more, you will do nothing to change it and I would certainly not allow anything to happen. Cowards never thrive.

I have taken off the rainbow glasses that magnified everything you did and have begun to view them practically, untainted, without prejudice. And then they seem harmless, ordinary, very everyday.  

So, why dwell in misery and wonder about all the has beens that could have been and all the maybes that never will be.

You are precious, but you are not the reason I live. And now that I know where to fit you in, I carry no burden.

I set you free.

I set myself free.”